


A Not So Merry Christmas

by Shnowflake27



Category: Books - Fandom, Christmas - Fandom, Poetry - Fandom, depression - Fandom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:35:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27498055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shnowflake27/pseuds/Shnowflake27
Summary: A poetry collection about the depression of Christmas. I am new at poetry.
Kudos: 1





	A Not So Merry Christmas

Christmas Poetry collection: A not so Merry Christmas

The memory of you  
Hangs stale in the air  
Poisoning my lungs 

It causes an itch  
That makes me hope  
For some kind of Christmas wish.

You're not here  
But we still hang your initial ornaments  
On our Christmas Tree

You're not here  
But we still hang your stocking on our fireplace

You're not here  
But your face is still everywhere

You're not here  
But you could've been here.

It's the most wonderful time of year  
When my eyes fill with nostalgic tears  
They blur the past years  
Have I told you all my fears?

I put pen to paper  
And I write once more  
The lies  
"We're doing fine! Hope you're well."  
Followed by  
"Merry Christmas!"  
"Happy New Year!"  
Is it really Merry?  
Is it really a New Year?  
Or is it just wrapped up pretty with the promise of being better?  
We do the same shit  
Day after day  
year after year  
I'm living one of my fears

What hurts the most  
Is that you don't miss  
Making too many cookies  
You don't miss  
Going on field trips together  
You don't miss  
Opening presents together  
On Christmas Eve  
You don't miss  
Going for walks to look at the lights  
You don't miss  
Messaging me online every day  
And playing dumb games together  
You don't miss  
Me calling you my brother  
You don't miss  
The way I didn't realize I'd treated you  
What hurts the most is that  
You don't miss me  
Like I miss you. 

Holidays aren't always fun  
For everyone  
When there is an immense pressure  
To enjoy something so much  
When it's not physically possible  
For some people to be that happy

But what some people don't realize  
Is that the happiness that Christmas is supposed to bestow  
Is fake  
It's pushed by companies to make you buy their products  
But they know you'll still be sad  
If you can't have a real smile this Christmas  
Don't feel bad

When it's our smiles  
That hide how broken  
Is our hearts  
It's our laugh  
That cries hide behind  
It's our joyful pictures  
That makes the fights unreal  
It's the lights  
It's the music  
It's the "joy in the air"  
That hides the hurt  
From the rest of the year

It's your hand I can't hold,  
That makes mine feel so cold.  
It's the empty space on the bed  
The pillow should be holding your head.  
It's your heat I miss  
When it's cold like this  
It's my heart that aches  
When we have to space  
It's the tears I cry  
When we say goodbye  
It's the fun I miss  
When you would steal a kiss  
It's my bones that know  
Winter fades slow.


End file.
